Lacking confidence is holding you back at work

“ We’d love to see a bit more confidence from you”

Who’s ever heard that one? You do your job really well, your performance reviews are always good but you’re forever getting passed on for promotions.

People who  do not have the same skills as you are promoted because they are charming, their hand is in the pocket of management and they have the gift of the gab.

As try as you might to perform well at interviews, you find yourself nervous and even though you know all the right things to say, you just can’t seem to articulate it as well as you rehearsed in the car.

The well rehearsed, confident, albeit (at times) less suitable candidate trumps your performance and lands the job and you end up working for someone who couldn’t even do your job well. You end up being pressured to take on more of their role to compensate for their inability and you watch them take the credit for it.

It leaves you feeling deflated. You wonder if anyone will ever see through the shiny charisma of your (so called) new boss and realise that you’re doing their job for them; but they don’t. They don’t ever notice your work and admittedly you don’t really put yourself out there anymore.

You’re quiet in meetings. Even when you have something important to say, you keep your mouth shut in fear of the confrontation, judgement or consequences. So you just fade away, you keep your thoughts to yourself and become increasingly frustrated and jaded by the whole organisation.

You think it might be time for a new job but you know you could never put yourself out there again.

What would happen if you could turn that around? What kind of difference would it make if you were able to stand up for yourself, say your piece and get noticed?

The fear is holding you back and it’s not just at work either. Where else are you hiding? In your romantic life, relationships, health and well being and even friendships? Lack of confidence can be crippling and it is self fulfilling; when you think you’re not confident, you lose confidence.

This fear then drives your performance and tints your reality. Even when you’ve done a great job, you lack the belief to recognise it, allowing someone else to take most of the credit- yet again.

Take some action in your life. Read up on how to be more confident. Take a course in assertiveness, get a coach, watch a YouTube channel on it, anything! You can learn how to have your confidence match your true capability and finally get ahead at work.

Top tips for quick confidence:

1.       Before any important meeting or interview,  adjust your posture. Make sure your shoulders are back and your head it facing forward, not up or eyes to the ground; even and straight.
2. Use mantras to get you into state, use “All the confidence/certainty I need, is within me now.” If you have the space say it out loud then do so on repeat and really feel it; if not, do it in your head. Grow taller and stronger with each repetition
3.    Practice. In order to gain confidence you’re going to have to risk stuffing up. You’re either going to win or learn. So take a deep breath, build your certainty and give it a go.

Here’s to getting ahead at work!

Peace, Katie Nicole

For more tips and tricks on all things confidence,  follow More Confidence on social media @moreconfidence

For your free e-book, the "5 secrets to bulletproof confidence", email loveyourself@moreconfidence.com.au